I Saw Something Nasty in the Woodshed

On Monday, after Larry went to work, I embarked on some yard work.  I prefer to trim the hedges when Larry is not home, since, as you married women will doubtless understand, I prefer not to receive his input on HOW to trim the hedges. 

Upon opening the potting shed I got a nasty surprise. (Okay, it’s not actually a woodshed, but you astute readers will perhaps recognize the blog title as a quotation from the excellent Stella Gibbons novel, Cold Comfort Farm.  If you’ve not read it, may I suggest it as an excellent summer read.)

There was a box of old picture frames in the back corner of the shed in which a rat had made a nest.  I am pretty good at compartmentalizing, so I mentally shelved that problem, trimmed my hedges, and locked the shed back up.

On Tuesday I had every intention of cleaning out the nest, but I had to run an errand in Los Gatos, and once I was there, I decided to make a day of it.  I managed to do four of my favorite things:

1.   Eat eggs in a diner while reading the newspaper

2.   Take a walk in an unfamiliar neighborhood

3.   Find an excellent public toilet

4.   Buy used books

Activities three and four both took place at the Los Gatos Public Library.  I love libraries.

On Wednesday I was determined to clear the nest.  I had some liquid courage in the form of alcoholic kombucha, which I decided contained both black tea for strength of purpose, and alcohol to blunt the edges of disgust.

I threw away the things the rat had chewed up and reorganized everything else.  Mostly the rat chewed the wooden picture frames, a cardboard box, and a paper bag; but also, confusingly, a plastic badminton set.  However, I couldn’t bring myself to move the box with the nest in it, not even with gloves on.  I decided to use my feminine wiles to get Larry to move the box.

I know the way to his heart – we watched the all three two-hour episodes of the PBS American Experience documentary “Chasing the Moon”.  (As a result, I didn’t see the Bachelorette Hometown Visits, but I’m all about the Fantasy Suites anyway.)

It worked!  Buoyed up after watching the courage of the NASA astronauts, on Thursday morning Larry disposed of the rat nest.  He even swept out the shed!

Hasta la vista, raton.