Read Less

Every year when magazines publish lists of New Year’s Resolutions, one that hits the top of many peoples’ lists is “Read More Books”.

I think my immediate family, at least, would argue that I should in fact read less, and perhaps do something about the leak in the roof, do some laundry, and learn to cook something besides vegetable soup.

Currently I am in three book groups.  That may seem excessive, but I don’t work outside the home, and frankly, I don’t work that much inside the home, so I have plenty of time to read.

And thanks to the waves of popularity that buoy up certain books, frequently my book groups end up reading the same books.

All three of my book groups, for instance, read the Pulitzer Prize winning title “Less”, written by Andrew Sean Greer.  Most of the ladies did not care for the book and did not find it amusing, thanks to its luckless protagonist. 

However, I have a pretty dark sense of humor and I thoroughly enjoyed reading about all the terrible things that befell Arthur Less.  The examples of the misunderstandings caused by his inability to speak German made me laugh aloud.

Most of my reading, though, is not of a Pulitzer Prize winning nature.  A friend asked me yesterday for a book recommendation, and I blanked.  All I could think of were books that I enjoyed but would be embarrassed to recommend.

Recently I have read and enjoyed Agatha Christie mysteries, Sherlock Holmes homage mysteries, those Rick Riordan fantasy books intended for twelve-year-old boys, those awful Selection books by Keira Cass marketed to ninth-grade girls, Dave Barry humor novels set in the you-can’t-make-this-shit-up state of Florida, a really dreadful Juliana Gray romance novel entitled “How to Tame Your Duke” etc. etc.

I was asked for the recommendation at a party of Duke fans who had gathered to watch the Duke/Carolina game.  Duke lost its mojo completely thirty-three seconds into the game when Zion Williamson injured his knee, so I had plenty of time to cruise through Amazon on my phone and find some titles that I had read and enjoyed that had at least some literary merit.

Oh, look at the time, I have to go make some vegetable soup now.

He Estado en la Casa Blanca

This evening I made life just a little bit better for twenty community college students.  We were playing the classic foreign language learning game of Bingo in my Intermediate Spanish class, and as the only member of the class who has been to the White House, I enabled everyone to complete a Bingo on the second column down on their cards for five extra credit points.

One student got lucky and asked me the pivotal question, and every head in the room turned to us.  Nineteen more times I was asked: “¿Katherine, ha estado en la Casa Blanca?”

And nineteen times I answered: “¡Si! He estado en la Casa Blanca.”

I love taking community college classes.  I love Intermediate Spanish so much that this is my sixth or seventh time taking the course.

In high school I took Latin, which was useful for scoring high on the verbal section of the SAT, but useless if you want to converse with anyone outside of Vatican City.

My quest to learn Spanish began with an after work Berlitz class at my first job in Manhattan.  Since then, I have taken many Spanish classes in many community centers, libraries, and colleges. 

When my youngest daughter started elementary school, I decided to start Spanish at Foothill College right up the street.  Over twelve years there I gradually progressed through Beginning Spanish 1,2, and 3, Intermediate Spanish 1, and then I kind of stalled.

I failed Intermediate Spanish 2 twice, after which I decided to try a different community college.

So now I’m at Cañada College a little further up the street and taking Intermediate Spanish 1 again.

I love meeting the wide variety of people who sign up for community college.  Usually the youngest compañero de clase is a disaffected sixteen-year-old high school student and the oldest is well into their golden years.

We do a lot of personal sharing in class, although usually in Spanish, so I only get about 60% of the content, but what I can understand is very interesting.

¡Vamos a aprender Español!

Today's Pointless Activity

It is Ellen’s birthday this coming weekend, which I used as an excuse to shop for and create a pointless craft.  At some point in my youth, I heard the aphorism “Time that you enjoy wasting isn’t wasted time.”  I have really taken this to heart over the last 40 years or so.

I spent the morning cleaning for the cleaning ladies.  I used to feel guilty about paying ladies to clean my house. Then I read an Alexander McCall Smith book set in Botswana, in which the wise protagonist Precious Ramotswe chides her neighbor for being rich enough to provide others with work and not doing so.

It’s not that I’m too lazy to clean my own house - I’m sharing my wealth!  But I can’t let the ladies think I am a slovenly housekeeper, so I spend hours making sure there isn’t any dirty underwear lying about or crusty pots on the stove, etc. etc.

I used to leave the dog at home with the ladies but he has developed anxiety about the vacuum cleaner which causes him to empty his bladder on the staircase, so now I have to take him with me to run errands.

He travels in the back of my Cadillac in his crate.  We think that the dog’s consciousness  effectively winks out of existence while he is in the crate.  He doesn’t make a sound and I tend to forget he’s back there.

I took the dog home once the ladies were safely gone and then I went to a Michael’s craft store.  For me, being in Michael’s is kind of like the dog being in the crate.  I was in there for nearly three hours, as if time had become suspended as I wandered around idly thinking about crafts.

My ostensible purpose was to buy a “substrate” for my collage of doll pictures, but I got way more than that.  I wonder if it is physically possible for me to live long enough to finish all the projects I’ve started…

I bought Amy a whittling kit, because that is the sort of thing she enjoys.  We had a pleasant family evening eating polenta, watching the Bachelor, drinking white wine, and crafting.

I did finish my gift for Ellen, and I hope she likes it.